Director: Patrick Horvath
Genre: Horror-Comedy
Runtime: 1h 25m
TMDB Rating: 4.5/10
Plot: A Half-Baked Horror Punslaught
Two inept criminals, Rocky (Joshua Grote) and Ruben (Larry Purtell), bungle a robbery and take refuge in an all-night diner. Their hostage situation spirals into chaos when the diner’s deranged chef, Koch (Kurt Sinclair), reveals a taste for human flesh. What follows is a messy blend of slapstick violence and groan-worthy wordplay, as the trio—and a handful of unlucky customers—battle for survival. The film’s title sets the tone: a relentless barrage of puns that wear thin faster than a dull meat cleaver.
Visual Style: Greasy Spoons and Gore
Horvath leans into grungy, low-budget aesthetics: flickering fluorescent lights, sticky diner booths, and practical effects that range from campy (rubber intestines) to unintentionally comedic (a CGI blood splatter straight out of Windows Movie Maker). The claustrophobic setting holds potential, but repetitive camera angles and murky lighting sap energy from the carnage. A standout scene involving a deep-fryer showdown hints at the dark humor the film could have achieved.
Cast: Chewing Scenery (and Limbs)
Kurt Sinclair (Koch): Sinclair’s unhinged chef channels early Peter Jackson madness, but his over-the-top antics teeter between entertaining and exhausting.
Joshua Grote (Rocky): Grote’s panicked reactions and bumbling dialogue land a few laughs, though his character’s idiocy strains believability.
Larry Purtell (Ruben): Purtell’s deadpan delivery provides fleeting moments of levity, but the script gives him little to work with beyond clichéd thug tropes.
Themes: Missed Satirical Bites
The film flirts with satire—mocking heist tropes, consumerism, and even culinary pretension—but lacks the wit or focus to commit. Koch’s obsession with “artisanal” human dishes could have skewered foodie culture, but the jokes devolve into lazy cannibal gags. Even the title’s pun feels like a first-draft placeholder.
Reception: A Flop on the Menu
Critics dismissed Die-ner as “a reheated Texas Chainsaw knockoff with dad jokes.” Audiences echoed the sentiment, citing cringe-worthy dialogue and uneven pacing. The 4.5 TMDB score reflects its reputation as a forgettable midnight movie, though a niche crowd praises its so-bad-it’s-kinda-fun charm.
Critic’s Verdict
Die-ner (Get It?) is a schlocky misfire that mistakes quantity for quality—both in gore and puns. While Sinclair’s manic energy and a few absurd kills offer fleeting entertainment, the film’s lack of cohesion and originality leaves it rotting under the heat lamp.
Strengths
Kurt Sinclair’s unhinged performance.
A handful of creatively grisly kills.
Weaknesses
Exhausting puns and tonal whiplash.
Underdeveloped satire and lazy scripting.
Visuals that scream “film school project.”
Rating: 4/10
A late-night curiosity for die-hard horror-comedy completists, but everyone else should skip the special.
Pair With
Dead Alive (1992) for masterful campy gore, or Dude Bro Party Massacre III (2015) for self-aware absurdity.
Cultural Footprint
While not a mainstream success, Die-ner (Get It?) has carved out a niche within the indie horror community. Its attempt to subvert traditional genre conventions and its self-aware humor contribute to ongoing discussions about the evolution of horror-comedy and the creative potential of low-budget filmmaking.